THE OBSCURITY OF EXISTENCE

Category: Uncategorized

Letter to my old self

Hello dear,

I hope that you find this letter in good health and the merrier of times, because you will not like what is about to follow. I apologize for starting the letter in a rude way. It is not all bad, but it is not what you are hoping either. You might want to make your walk longer today, you are not going to get enough a while later and while we are at it, please read a book or two more because I miss smelling those old pages and taking it all in: the beauty of those long lost words.

You shall wonder what has happened after all and you should, your life depends on it. I had a peaceful day after a very long time. I had the time to sip my coffee alone and in peace, I had the chance to eat my lunch alone and I finally got my hand on The Ulysses. If I had just known how much easier it would be to not think about anyone but myself, I would have done that more If I were you.

Don’t be fooled by Beethoven when we says:

Ever thine. 
Ever mine. 
Ever ours. 

And mind that Voltaire is not going to do any good either when you will be swayed by his words: No, nothing has the power to part me from you; our love is based upon virtue, and will last as long as our lives.

Those great men with love and passion led the bravest of lives and from what I feel, misery never left their side. It is a word of caution my friend, think twice before you close your eyes and lean for a kiss, It will eventually lead you to believe in a happily ever after, but sadly none exists. You will get your heart broken over the pettiest of matters and you will let go of what you know as the love of your life. Love will consume you to the deepest of your soul. It will find you in the wilderness of the night and will sing songs to you. It will whisper in your dreams and make you see things which will forever be your fragment of imagination.

You will, my dear, have moonlit walks and dinner by the lake. You will have your share of warmth in the bed and supper in the coziest arms. But you will not be spared of the long nights spent writhing in pain, agonizing over spilled words. You will have to walk barefeet on the summer afternoon sand to known the pleasure of walking by the beach in the night. You will have to feel the burn to know the tingling feeling of sand sliding your skin.

I think I have given too much away. I do not mean to dishearten you. You will have a good life, but I have warn you of the things that lie ahead. You need to make a choice. Would you do it all over again because I know how much it means to you? Or, would you rather walk away because lonely nights have always scared you.

Be you. I do not know if this is the best of the advice, but this is all I got for you. Come reach me soon, I am waiting with a million other tales.

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The One with the day and night “F.R.I.E.N.D.S”

Okay. The heading itself will give you the gist of this rant: The one with the day and night “FRIENDS”. This was the time when I was totally high on friends. On this earth full of weird people and their own weird likes and dislikes, I guess there is no one who hates this epic series. At least, I haven’t come across any such person and I hope I never do. There is nothing more to say about this because everybody is well-versed with the “Charm of FRIENDS” and may be the explanation will not be enough justify the awesomeness of this extravagantly addictive series. So, basically this was the day when I could not do anything but watch back to back episodes with two hours of the dinner break and an extra of 10-15 human minutes.

It started one fine Friday afternoon when the chilly atmosphere of the RC and the stress relieving time (as the exams had just got over), all directed me towards one thing – “Watch FRIENDS”. So, right from 4:00 P.M. the journey of endless friends continued up until 9:30 A.M.

WARNING: If you are trying this you might be high on all sorts of emotions, your eyes will pop out or sink in and lack of sleep can take you away from conservation with people and they will be bound to call you “CRANKY PANTS!”

PS: I will try not to reveal any of the amazing moments “friends” have.

So, here goes.

I was midway in the fourth season and by now the story had taken a good pace and I could make an outline of the final shape the story was going to take further. I knew from the beginning which of the love birds are going to hook up, but it is like a ride through a carnival to see them together. I have had the most amazing laughter, the most amazing silence, the most amazing emotional crying outburst, the most amazing awkward scene, the most amazing foolishness and the most amazing of F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

A friend of mine told me back in summer when he was too much into “FRIENDS” that it is impossible to decide your favorite character or it is impossible not to fall in love with all of them. I was not too convinced with this then because I had not seen the show and now I completely agree with him. Each one of them is unpredictable and they do not stop being your favorite, whatever happens. According to me, the best part about them is that I can relate to all the characters in some context or the other and so it makes me feel a kind of attachment with all of them. I find myself in all of their shoes. Feeling ascetic and on the seventh sky and sometimes so sad that I just feel like crawling into a shell.

You have no idea how hard it is to keep myself away from giving you any spoilers. There are so many turning points in the story that for a while I felt that all the assumptions I have made up till now about the ending are going wrong. I was so baffled and confused because the story was tracing its own twist and turns, and not the way I had imagined it to be and that is why I was so hooked to it that I could not press the “ESC” button and stop the show. Imagine, this was my condition till I completed the 4th season. I have four more to go and I am pretty excited about the shocks that it is going to give me. I just wanted that story to go on and on and so I let the tears of emotions flow from my eyes and some tears also because of no blinks and staring at the laptop screen with such a keen interest. But, after a while I had to stop because I was eventually turning into a zombie without any food or water and all the slouching on the bed. For a while, I also felt that I am a part of this story and all of these are real characters. It was hard getting back to my senses, not that I wanted to get them back.

Now, if I go on for a long time I will spoil the fun it offers. I just want to say – Watch “F.R.I.E.N.D.S”. I can’t describe how simply amazing it is. It will take you on this rollercoaster ride of emotions, make you skeptic about yourself, the chaos in the episode will torment your mood and the happiness and the fun will fill you with glee. All the characters Monica, Chandler, Joey, Rachel, Ross, Pheobe and not to forget the supporting cast and the guest appearances are equally responsible for it to be good. Like Gunther or the girl from the copy place and the Geller clan, Pheobe’s younger brother and her birth mother, the list will go on and on. They fill them with spice and fun.

Finally, I will give a break to my endless talking about friends.

Beautiful or Pretty

Am I beautiful?
or just pretty?
Beautiful, like those snow clad mountains in the distance
And the stream that flows by!
Or, Pretty? The kind where you see the endless sky
In shades of blue and white
And you sigh!
"Pretty, isn't it?"
Would I be the one
with whom you stay for a day and live
Live, like it is your forever.
And at the end you would say
Gasping for breath,
"Beautiful, beautiful, is all I have to say"
Or, Would I be the one,
With whom you spend
Nits and bits of your life?
Here and there we wander,
Finding pleasures in pieces of wonder
Having a Pretty life!

Death

Love is Death.

The most dangerous form of self destruction.

Happily you walk towards your own grave,

Enjoying every minute of the journey.

Love is, will always be, the most preferred way of self destruction.

Being killed by the things and people you are made of.

With smile on your lips and peace written all over your face,

Poisoned by the sweet words poured into our hearts

Now and again!